It makes me laugh when I read in the papers about so called 'Killer' chipmonks invading Britain. Really it's laughable.
All these stories about people being bitten by them is rather amusing.
Granted although they are related to the rodent family, they are more agressive than rats and mice. They're more of a predatory animal, so naturally if they feel threatened they are going to to turn around to a human and gnaw on your person.
Doesn't mean that they are killers, it just means they're smarter than you.
The fact that people claim to have been bitten by these animals begs the question, what were you doing. Chipmonks are creatures that will fight for their food and their safety and their home, so if you're sitting there with some chow or it seems like you are invading their territory naturally they're going to defend and attempt to take said chow from you.
I saw chipmonks at a safari park not so long ago, and as cute as they are they look like mean mo-fo's so let's go through Gemma's steps to not get bitten by one.
Step 1: If you see a chipmonk do not be alarmed, these animals can smell fear**, this gives them the upper hand
Step 2: If you have any food stuff in your hand, whether it sweet or savoury, surrender it, because lets face it it's easier to give it up and get something else than have a chipmonk eat you
Step 3: Keep your eye on the animal and slowly move away. Removing yourself from the animal and also its probably territory will prevent the chipmonk needing to bite you in defense
Step 4: Never approach a chipmonk. This is key in keeping them away from your extremities
Step 5: If a chipmonk bites you, do not panic. These animals have jaws of steel and the more you panic and fling your limbs around, the tighter they will grip. Relax, take deep breaths and stay still. It will be over in seconds.
(** Please note this is a lie as different species can NOT smell fear on each other eg. A horse cannot smell fear on a human etc)
Follow these steps and you will be able to lead a killer chipmonk fear free life.
However make sure you're tetanus shot is up to date and also you know how long you have to protect yourself against rabies.
Other wise enjoy the rest of the summer.
Friday, 31 July 2009
Thursday, 23 July 2009
The Day The Music Died (a little more)
I recently became aware that Pete Wentz (he of Fall Out Boy fame) has succumbed to releasing an EP on his Decaydance label by a band called Millionaires.
Who pray tell are these Millionaires? They are three girls who figured that an abundance of synthetic pre-programmed keyboard melodies and talking over the top of said synthetic melodies would be an incredible idea. Which in reality creates something so overly ridiculous, you would like to stab your own eyes out with something blunt, because the sound is so atrocious.
There has been a lot of things said recently because many bands have spoken out against this trio while they have played Warped tour. Most notably Hayley Williams, lead vocalist of the band Paramore. She had some words to say about the band, which has led to a split in opinion – should she really have the audacity to state publicly how she feels about a band who are on the same management roster? Should other bands lash out at others who are making music?
I believe that when people such as this trio are allowed or are given the chance to rise up onto a public platform then people should definitely speak out about how they feel. The more notable question however is not why they have been granted this opportunity to get to where they are but how they came to achieve it. Clearly this has something to do with the (mostly) negative press that the trio have received, and this just shows you how the media works and how the record companies use this to their advantage.
The trio themselves have said that they have no talent for either playing instruments or singing – even saying that people should look up to them. Which for all intent and purposes begs the question why? Their so called music is atrocious, they can't even talk over the melodies without sounding like drowning cats, their lyrics are obscene and blunt and basically something that you could imagine someone like Manson or Eminem wailing on about not teenage girls who have less talent than your average piece of household fluff.
But they are not the only band doing this, there are many others who have lyrics so atrocious and who are so talentless, but who seem to have suckered people in, it makes me quite sad knowing that the music industry has allowed this tripe to filter through into a sort of mainstream platform.
People can criticise boybands and girlbands all they want, but at least you knew that for the most part they had talent (this doesn't mean all of them did, I can think of a few bands who were talentless), they could at least hold a tune, dance and at least their songs had meaning. The rock bands – hair metal, classic rock, whatever. Their lyrics at times or for the most part could be deemed as atrocious, or said to be in the same light as these new “crunkcore” bands. That may be so, but lets not forget that these classic rockers wrote about what they know, they wrote about their own experiences, not about being underage and getting drunk and whatever other tripe people are writing about these days.
Honestly, I find myself becoming more and more disillusioned with the music that is being released these days. It seems that there are only so many artists who continue to make good music. Green Day are one, AC/DC another. Then the likes of Fall Out Boy, who were doing well up until their Folie A Deux record when they completely ruined it and have slowly gone down hill (Wentz I am looking at you for this one). The lyrics of bands such as FOB have slowly, especially for Folie A Deux, they have slowly started falling short. Where once we had multiple layers of analogies laced with a bitter facade and an underlying meaning, we are being given some ridiculous tripe that doesn't hold the same fun and meaning.
Thank God then for people such as Mark Read. I'm holding out hope for him and that he can get back into the charts. He deserves it, he's worked hard at what he does.There's none of this overblown tripe and over produced and ridiculously synthetic music, nor are there any lyrical nuances. It is just him, his music, his words, his thoughts and you get that, you can hear it in the songs. Pure emotion and pure feeling and experience.
That is what music is missing these days, sure you get the occasional song which may be catchy as a cold, and may be nothing but pure fun, but if its done in the right way it is not offensive. Personally I am craving the day when a band sort of sits up and thinks, 'oh we should write about what we know, what we've experienced'. But it's doubtful if anyone will do it with any amount of skill.
So, I suppose in conclusion there isn't a lot any of us can do except hold out hope that things will change, so until then, I would like to suggest that you all go get a copy of or at least listen to Mark Read, and get to know how songs should be written.
Who pray tell are these Millionaires? They are three girls who figured that an abundance of synthetic pre-programmed keyboard melodies and talking over the top of said synthetic melodies would be an incredible idea. Which in reality creates something so overly ridiculous, you would like to stab your own eyes out with something blunt, because the sound is so atrocious.
There has been a lot of things said recently because many bands have spoken out against this trio while they have played Warped tour. Most notably Hayley Williams, lead vocalist of the band Paramore. She had some words to say about the band, which has led to a split in opinion – should she really have the audacity to state publicly how she feels about a band who are on the same management roster? Should other bands lash out at others who are making music?
I believe that when people such as this trio are allowed or are given the chance to rise up onto a public platform then people should definitely speak out about how they feel. The more notable question however is not why they have been granted this opportunity to get to where they are but how they came to achieve it. Clearly this has something to do with the (mostly) negative press that the trio have received, and this just shows you how the media works and how the record companies use this to their advantage.
The trio themselves have said that they have no talent for either playing instruments or singing – even saying that people should look up to them. Which for all intent and purposes begs the question why? Their so called music is atrocious, they can't even talk over the melodies without sounding like drowning cats, their lyrics are obscene and blunt and basically something that you could imagine someone like Manson or Eminem wailing on about not teenage girls who have less talent than your average piece of household fluff.
But they are not the only band doing this, there are many others who have lyrics so atrocious and who are so talentless, but who seem to have suckered people in, it makes me quite sad knowing that the music industry has allowed this tripe to filter through into a sort of mainstream platform.
People can criticise boybands and girlbands all they want, but at least you knew that for the most part they had talent (this doesn't mean all of them did, I can think of a few bands who were talentless), they could at least hold a tune, dance and at least their songs had meaning. The rock bands – hair metal, classic rock, whatever. Their lyrics at times or for the most part could be deemed as atrocious, or said to be in the same light as these new “crunkcore” bands. That may be so, but lets not forget that these classic rockers wrote about what they know, they wrote about their own experiences, not about being underage and getting drunk and whatever other tripe people are writing about these days.
Honestly, I find myself becoming more and more disillusioned with the music that is being released these days. It seems that there are only so many artists who continue to make good music. Green Day are one, AC/DC another. Then the likes of Fall Out Boy, who were doing well up until their Folie A Deux record when they completely ruined it and have slowly gone down hill (Wentz I am looking at you for this one). The lyrics of bands such as FOB have slowly, especially for Folie A Deux, they have slowly started falling short. Where once we had multiple layers of analogies laced with a bitter facade and an underlying meaning, we are being given some ridiculous tripe that doesn't hold the same fun and meaning.
Thank God then for people such as Mark Read. I'm holding out hope for him and that he can get back into the charts. He deserves it, he's worked hard at what he does.There's none of this overblown tripe and over produced and ridiculously synthetic music, nor are there any lyrical nuances. It is just him, his music, his words, his thoughts and you get that, you can hear it in the songs. Pure emotion and pure feeling and experience.
That is what music is missing these days, sure you get the occasional song which may be catchy as a cold, and may be nothing but pure fun, but if its done in the right way it is not offensive. Personally I am craving the day when a band sort of sits up and thinks, 'oh we should write about what we know, what we've experienced'. But it's doubtful if anyone will do it with any amount of skill.
So, I suppose in conclusion there isn't a lot any of us can do except hold out hope that things will change, so until then, I would like to suggest that you all go get a copy of or at least listen to Mark Read, and get to know how songs should be written.
Sunday, 19 July 2009
An Elephant Never Forgets
No matter how much they want to...
I'm optimistic about things, sometimes I would like to see the downside, but somehow something stops me and I always think positive.
Positivity has granted me the chance to do so many things.
I was sitting thinking about some of the things that I've accomplished and the one thing that seems to still allude me is the fact that I have made an aquaintance with someone whom I admired years ago (about 5 years ago to be more precise). That is more than I could have thought possible, and the fact that it seems so normal is surreal.
And also, knowing that I have a chance, through a contact that could possibly lead me to meeting another person I admire, gives me hope that I will achieve an ultimate goal, I'm unsure what that goal will be, but I know that it could happen. At this point its a case of waiting and seeing where the tide takes everything.
But I say, its okay to dream, dreams do come true - and when they do, like elephants in the proverb, you will never forget.
Sunday, 12 July 2009
Collaboration Taboo
I read something the other night, it was in response to someone asking about bands co-writing songs - asking if it was okay for bands to do so, does it bring their credibility down?
And I found that a few of the comments people made were rather ignorant.
Many were saying things along the lines of if the band is 'credible' then they should not collaborate with a song writer, and that its really only acceptable to pop musicians, and I really disagree.
I find the whole songwriting process fascinating, the fact that someone can sit and take something that occurs pretty much everyday and create something that is sometimes so powerful is an art, and I think that for people to dismiss it and deem it discrediting is a joke.
Songwriters are an entity in themselves, just because someone is in a band or is a recording artist doesn't mean that they have the ability to produce a decent song, also the fact that the songwriting process includes creating the melody and the music seems to be a moot point, something that people seem to forget about. It's easy to forget that a band may not come up with the hook in a chorus, because for the most part people are talking lyrically.
Many musicians collaborate on the writing process, mostly because it is easier to have help, why would someone pass up the chance to have a stand out line that could have been missed if they didn't have that help? While it is sometimes seen by some fans as misleading if a band collaborates it must be remembered that a recording artist may not possess the skills for the job - some people can write music and not play well, some play well but can't write.
Same goes for lyrics.
I suppose knowing a songwriter on a sort of personal level (aquainted through the industry - he used to be in a favourite band of mine, now he's a solo artist and I went to a show, interviewed him and chatted randomly throughout the night - he's awesome), I have a small insight into the process. Writers take their inspiration from everyday life, from the low points and the high - everything from break ups to a happy time in their lives, and they use these life experiences to craft a song. You can't have a song written by a young band about some of the more detailed life experiences, if you think you do more often than not (because sometimes they can do it but mostly not) they will have collaborated on the song with someone else.
This is not deemed discrediting, if anything it shows that they have faith in their abilities and their music, being able to take a song either fully written or co-written by someone else and making it their own is a definite skill, one that not many possess.
I don't think it's anything shameful to have someone outside of the band or the recording artist to come in and assist during the production of a song. Regardless of the artist, although having said that, many bands co-write songs with each other - does this fall under the same scrutiny? Or is it because they are all in the same band this is deemed okay?
It's not just younger artists, older ones have help too - the writer I mentioned earlier has collaborated with Robin Gibb, Jarvis Cocker, and Rick Astley to name a few.
Jarvis Cocker being the vocalist and frontman of the 'credible' band Pulp, working with songwriters to collaborate on projects? Yes really.
Anyway, I guess the point I'm trying to get across is not to dismiss the collaboration when artists write songs, many of the great songs were co-written with songwriters who worked with the band to guide them and shape the song. Many of the great songs weren't actually written by the artist who sings them.
Either way we must remember that songwriting is a forgotten and occassionally misguided artform, many think that it is easy to just pop an idea out onto paper, but it sometimes takes weeks before a song is perfected, on occassion it would take minutes, it all depends on the situation the writer is in.
Co-writing is not a crime, it is a vital part of the music industry. If we didn't have songwriters in the background assisting with guiding the artists we'd end up with a bunch of the same old songs, sounding the same and all whining about misplaced love or loving someone, which for the record is not great. So people stop complaining that its wrong for any recording artist (aside from those pop-stars) to work with other people, if they didn't you wouldn't have these great songs.
So before you complain about the industry and niggling unimportant things, know what you're talking about.
And I found that a few of the comments people made were rather ignorant.
Many were saying things along the lines of if the band is 'credible' then they should not collaborate with a song writer, and that its really only acceptable to pop musicians, and I really disagree.
I find the whole songwriting process fascinating, the fact that someone can sit and take something that occurs pretty much everyday and create something that is sometimes so powerful is an art, and I think that for people to dismiss it and deem it discrediting is a joke.
Songwriters are an entity in themselves, just because someone is in a band or is a recording artist doesn't mean that they have the ability to produce a decent song, also the fact that the songwriting process includes creating the melody and the music seems to be a moot point, something that people seem to forget about. It's easy to forget that a band may not come up with the hook in a chorus, because for the most part people are talking lyrically.
Many musicians collaborate on the writing process, mostly because it is easier to have help, why would someone pass up the chance to have a stand out line that could have been missed if they didn't have that help? While it is sometimes seen by some fans as misleading if a band collaborates it must be remembered that a recording artist may not possess the skills for the job - some people can write music and not play well, some play well but can't write.
Same goes for lyrics.
I suppose knowing a songwriter on a sort of personal level (aquainted through the industry - he used to be in a favourite band of mine, now he's a solo artist and I went to a show, interviewed him and chatted randomly throughout the night - he's awesome), I have a small insight into the process. Writers take their inspiration from everyday life, from the low points and the high - everything from break ups to a happy time in their lives, and they use these life experiences to craft a song. You can't have a song written by a young band about some of the more detailed life experiences, if you think you do more often than not (because sometimes they can do it but mostly not) they will have collaborated on the song with someone else.
This is not deemed discrediting, if anything it shows that they have faith in their abilities and their music, being able to take a song either fully written or co-written by someone else and making it their own is a definite skill, one that not many possess.
I don't think it's anything shameful to have someone outside of the band or the recording artist to come in and assist during the production of a song. Regardless of the artist, although having said that, many bands co-write songs with each other - does this fall under the same scrutiny? Or is it because they are all in the same band this is deemed okay?
It's not just younger artists, older ones have help too - the writer I mentioned earlier has collaborated with Robin Gibb, Jarvis Cocker, and Rick Astley to name a few.
Jarvis Cocker being the vocalist and frontman of the 'credible' band Pulp, working with songwriters to collaborate on projects? Yes really.
Anyway, I guess the point I'm trying to get across is not to dismiss the collaboration when artists write songs, many of the great songs were co-written with songwriters who worked with the band to guide them and shape the song. Many of the great songs weren't actually written by the artist who sings them.
Either way we must remember that songwriting is a forgotten and occassionally misguided artform, many think that it is easy to just pop an idea out onto paper, but it sometimes takes weeks before a song is perfected, on occassion it would take minutes, it all depends on the situation the writer is in.
Co-writing is not a crime, it is a vital part of the music industry. If we didn't have songwriters in the background assisting with guiding the artists we'd end up with a bunch of the same old songs, sounding the same and all whining about misplaced love or loving someone, which for the record is not great. So people stop complaining that its wrong for any recording artist (aside from those pop-stars) to work with other people, if they didn't you wouldn't have these great songs.
So before you complain about the industry and niggling unimportant things, know what you're talking about.
Friday, 10 July 2009
In The Beginning...
Nothing much happened.
Unless todays 4 hour stint at the dental hospital today is exciting for anyone, most of it consisted of waiting, the other 3/4 consisted of x-ray and lots of pain.
Other than that this is just a hello post. I've had the mindset to grab a new one of these because, well I lost the password to the other and to be honest I don't think there's anything remotely interesting on there. Not that there will be on here, but hopefully I'll remember that I have this and will update regularly.
Unlike many of the other places I have registered to heh.
So yeah, just a brief hallo and that's it.
Unless todays 4 hour stint at the dental hospital today is exciting for anyone, most of it consisted of waiting, the other 3/4 consisted of x-ray and lots of pain.
Other than that this is just a hello post. I've had the mindset to grab a new one of these because, well I lost the password to the other and to be honest I don't think there's anything remotely interesting on there. Not that there will be on here, but hopefully I'll remember that I have this and will update regularly.
Unlike many of the other places I have registered to heh.
So yeah, just a brief hallo and that's it.
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